


red

by yu_ish



Category: ChroNoiR, Nijisanji
Genre: Fluff, Light Angst, M/M, Reincarnation, chronoir lore compliant, despite the dramatic summary there's rly not that much angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-26
Updated: 2020-11-26
Packaged: 2021-03-09 17:53:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27730339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yu_ish/pseuds/yu_ish
Summary: Red like the color of Kuzuha's eyes, like the undershirt of the tracksuit Kuzuha always wore to sleep, like the fresh strawberries on his favorite pudding.Red like blood.
Relationships: Kanae/Kuzuha (Nijisanji)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 239





	red

Kanae used to think,

— of course, vampires would like red.

Red like the color of Kuzuha's eyes, like the undershirt of the tracksuit Kuzuha always wore to sleep, like the fresh strawberries on his favorite pudding. Kanae's not sure if that's what drove him to try it exactly, but when he walked out of the shower wearing Kuzuha's pyjamas with a joking smile already on his face, he wasn't expecting this reaction at all.

Surprised laughter, maybe. Or the mild, habitual annoyance at his antics that Kanae knew not to take too seriously. Instead, Kuzuha just stared at him silently. 

"... as I thought, red doesn't suit you at all."

* * *

Usually, for Kuzuha's birthday, the company would arrange for new event-exclusive goods to be released for fans. And as always, new goods meant new photoshoots.

Kuzuha had a surprising amount of patience when it came to these things. Depending on the amount of material needed and the effect the photographer was looking for, shoots could take from a few hours to an entire day.

Though the vampire had a bad habit of being late to these shoots, in the history of their joint ChroNoiR activities, Kanae had never seen his partner complain about the long sessions - even when their makeup had to be redone for the fifth time, or the photographer had them retake the same set of photos for hours.

Kuzuha did, however, tend to get bored; especially as he often wasn't able to use his phone on set. The fact that this time around was a solo photoshoot likely wouldn't help. 

So, as the kind and wonderful partner he was (Kuzuha would probably raise his eyebrows at this phrasing) - of course, Kanae had to come to the company for a surprise visit on set.

Peeking his head through the doorway of the company studio, Kanae took in the sight of dozens of helium-filled balloons floating over the back of a white-haired head.

There weren't too many people on set today. Along with a handful of Nijisanji staff, there was the familiar sight of the pig standing off to the side watching over the arrangements, as well as Kuzuha's usual green-haired photographer. 

Taking care not to disturb Kuzuha while the vampire was still focused on the camera, Kanae pulled down his face mask and tapped the shoulder of the nearest staff member to alert them of his presence.

They silently bowed and gestured to each other in greeting. After getting the okay, he looked around the set for a good place to watch from.

While the studio wasn't particularly large, there were plenty of areas hidden in shadow as a result of preventing unexpected light sources from affecting the photos. He found a spot against the wall off to the side.

On the set's luxurious couch, Kuzuha was holding a large bouquet of red roses, an unusually focused expression on his face as he listened to the photographer's instructions. The crimson of his irises seemed especially bright today, and the subtle eyeliner the makeup artist had added made his already aristocratic facial features look sharper. 

Kanae nodded to himself a little proudly - as expected, the vampire really was good looking.

After watching the photographer take a couple more photos, the director called for a short break. Kuzuha yawned a little sleepily, standing up and stretching before heading towards the water cooler. As the vampire stood waiting for the water to dispense into his paper cup, he felt a tap on his shoulder.

Turning his head to see who it was, his eyes widened visibly in surprise.

"Eh, Kanae? What are you doing here?"

From behind him, Kanae's eyes curved into happy crescents, waving both hands in greeting. "Wah, no hello? I'm hurt~ I can't come visit my partner?"

"Well, well - if you put it that way - "

Despite his brash tone, Kuzuha seemed to unconsciously perk up a little, like a pomeranian that saw someone familiar again after a long time. It was cute, Kanae couldn't help but think. It made him want to rub the top of the vampire's head, though that would probably result in immediate protests.

After Kuzuha picked up his cup, Kanae pulled him a little to the side so they wouldn't block the cooler, chatting quietly as they moved.

Kanae watched Kuzuha fondly as the vampire spoke animatedly about his day on set, interjecting occasionally with his own comments. Maybe it came with being a streamer, but Kuzuha was someone who could make even mundane things sound interesting. 

The vampire also seemed more talkative than usual, probably from being bottled up all day. Just from talking about this and that, from how many strawberry lattes Kuzuha had this morning to the staff's struggles with the prickly roses to what games they were planning to play later, the minutes seemed to whisk by in an instant.

"Resuming in five!" The director's call interrupted the two absorbed in their own world.

"Eh, already -" Kuzuha seemed a little reluctant to return, so Kanae patted him on the arm with a reassuring smile. "Well, that's fine, I have to get back home soon for a collaboration stream anyway..."

Noticing the red roses from the shoot lying forgotten on a table beside them, Kanae suddenly released a mischievous smile, reaching out to pick up the bouquet. He turned around and tilted his head at Kuzuha teasingly.

"Hey, Ku-chan~ Take a selfie with me before I leave?" The brunet pressed the bouquet against his chest dramatically. "To commemorate our special day~"

"Oi, what is this crazy guy talking about, you just came to visit my photoshoot…" Though the response was nothing out of the ordinary, Kanae noticed a strange tenseness in the vampire's shoulders. While most wouldn't recognize it, Kanae knew Kuzuha too well not to see the slight discomfort in his expression and posture.

His partner's gaze lingered on the roses a moment too long, red eyes shifting unnaturally.

"...You take the photo," Kuzuha spoke up suddenly, reaching out to take the flowers from him with feigned casualness. Concealing a worried frown, Kanae obliged, pulling his cat-eared phone out of his sweater pocket and turning on the front camera.

“Smile!” Kanae reminded cheerfully, hooking his arm around Kuzuha’s and positioning his phone carefully to get them both in frame. He took a few shots before letting the vampire go, opening his photo gallery to delete the extras.

"Maybe I should post this," Kanae commented casually as he checked the photos, a hint of laughter in his voice. "ChroNoiR teetee?"

"...Well, do whatever you want." This was a routine exchange between them whenever Kanae insisted on taking pictures together, but they both knew Kanae was just joking every time.

Truthfully, Kanae always liked to keep photos taken with Kuzuha to himself. There was a sort of unspeakable feeling he had whenever he looked at their pictures in his phone gallery - like collecting little pieces of time that only belonged to the two of them.

Kanae checked his phone’s clock display. While his collab wasn’t scheduled for another hour or so, he still needed to get home to make dinner first. Pulling his face mask back on, he bid Kuzuha and the staff goodbye before heading out.

As he sat on the train, Kanae stared down at his phone with an unfathomable expression. On the screen, his selfie with Kuzuha was on display - their heads pressed close together, the bright crimson splash of roses, the slightly stiff smile on Kuzuha's lips.

— Red doesn't suit you, huh.

Unconsciously, his grip on the phone tightened. Unexpectedly, as he did so, a spark of pain shot through the finger pressed hard against the edge of his screen. 

Kanae winced slightly. Gingerly loosening his hand, he put the phone down on his lap to take a look.

On the tip of his index finger, there was a small, dark spot that hadn't been there before. He remembered the way he had picked up the roses earlier, holding the stems carelessly in hand as he smiled at his partner.

He picked up his phone again and tilted it to the side. 

There was a drop of blood smeared on his phone case.

* * *

Despite his chronic cough, Kanae's constitution wasn't particularly weak. It was just that sometimes he was bad at taking care of himself.

Kanae frowned, feeling the beginnings of a migraine throbbing behind his eyelids. Not for the first time, he'd stayed up too late streaming the night before, and the aftereffects seemed to be lingering longer than usual.

He tugged at the collar of his sweater, slightly uncomfortable. The fogginess in his head from waking up an hour ago hadn't completely dispersed either. The brunet pinched himself in an effort to stay alert as he sat at his PC, browsing twitter and absently watching the time.

Today was an offline collaboration stream with Kuzuha, which is why he was already up despite the late night. Since Kanae didn’t like the taste of coffee, there wasn’t any at home to drink in order to perk himself up for the stream. As he was weighing the pros and cons of downing an energy drink so soon after waking up,

Ding dong!

Kanae stood up from his chair, startled by the ring of the doorbell. He hurried out towards his front door. Surprisingly, Kuzuha was early today.

It was cold out. When Kanae opened the door, he was greeted with a rush of frosty air and the sight of a puffy black bundle of a vampire, wrapped in a large jacket and a red scarf covering half his face.

"Eh? Who is this?" Kanae joked as he hastily pulled Kuzuha inside and out of the cold, closing the door behind him. "Half an hour early? Are you really Kuzuha?"

"Oi oi, I'm not always late," Kuzuha grumbled half-heartedly, unzipping his jacket as Kanae helped pull off his scarf. Locating the closet near the entrance with a familiarity that often made Kanae question whose house this really was, Kuzuha haphazardly stuck the outerwear on his usual hanger.

As Kanae straightened the vampire's coat into a more stable position and hung the red scarf neatly on the clothing rack, he noted the slightly tired expression on Kuzuha's face. His partner's eyebags seemed a little darker than usual. 

"Have you eaten already?" Kanae asked. Sometimes the vampire would come over without even eating breakfast if he’d overslept an alarm that day. While Kuzuha hadn’t arrived late, Kanae remembered seeing Kuzuha streaming until almost as late as he had himself yesterday. 

“It’s okay, the pig made food,” Kuzuha answered distractedly, still looking for his slippers in the closet. “Did you reorganize your shoes again?”

“If you mean did I clean up the mess you left in there last time, then yes,” Kanae didn’t know whether to laugh or cry, nudging the closet door open wider with his foot. “Your slippers are in the back, check the right side.”

As Kuzuha headed towards the living room to set up his video capture for the stream, Kanae went into the kitchen. Pouring some filtered water into the kettle, he set it to boil, then turned to rummage through the kitchen cabinets.

There were still several packs left in the box of instant hot chocolate mix he'd bought the last time Kuzuha slept over. He poured a pack into a mug and dropped a tea bag into another, leaning against the counter to wait.

His headache was getting worse. Kanae pressed an arm against his forehead, squeezing his eyes shut in an attempt to will the pain away. He stood there without moving until the beep of the kettle sounded, interrupting his unsuccessful attempts to suppress his migraine.

Sighing, Kanae poured the hot water into the two mugs. He made sure to mix the hot chocolate powder thoroughly before picking a mug up in each hand. 

When he got back to the living room, Kuzuha was sitting cross-legged on the sofa, fiddling with the brunet’s phone. Handing the hot chocolate over and setting his own tea down on the coffee table, Kanae went to turn on the PS4 streaming setup he'd organized the night before.

Kanae tapped his fingers against the side of the game console as he waited for it to boot up, watching Kuzuha trying to drink the still scalding hot chocolate with amusement. It was cute, how Kuzuha held the drink in both hands to warm them up with the mug’s heat, taking tiny sips so he wouldn't burn his tongue.

Soon, the scheduled starting time arrived. Kuzuha set down his hot chocolate as Kanae turned on the stream, moving back to sit next to the vampire. Together, they did their usual ChroNoiR greeting, with Kanae briefly introducing today's game.

As they entered the rhythm of their usual banter, Kanae couldn’t help but feel uncomfortably aware that his condition was worse than usual.

Kanae massaged a hand against his temples while Kuzuha was distracted by something on screen. Though he'd been trying to act as normal as possible, his reaction time had obviously slowed, and his frequent mistakes in game were clearly starting to concern the viewers.

His head felt like it was overheating.

"Hey, I'm going to the washroom for a bit," he alerted Kuzuha with a tap on the shoulder. Kuzuha nodded absently in response.

Turning to look into the camera, Kanae smiled towards the viewers. "Don't miss me too much~" he teased as he got up from the sofa, getting a slight laugh out of the preoccupied vampire.

In the bathroom, the brunet splashed cold water on his face, trying to wake himself up. The shock of the chill seemed to clear his head for a moment, but the fuzzy heat seemed to crawl back through his brain every time, causing a few drops of sweat to roll down his temples.

He reached for the towel he usually used to wash his face, putting it under the running tap. Kanae closed his eyes and pushed up his bangs. Placing the wet towel over his eyelids, he let the water drip down over his flushed cheeks. 

Suddenly, he frowned. Somehow, the liquid felt… unusually warm.

Pulling the washcloth off his forehead, he used it to wipe down his face, opening his eyes to look at himself in the mirror.

His reflection was painted in red.

Blood streaked under his nose, across his chin, on his sweater. The washcloth was soaked in blood as well. As Kanae tried to stem the flow of blood coming from his nose, some of it smeared on his fingers, or dripped down into the collar of his shirt.

While he was still trying to stop the bleeding, the washroom door suddenly slammed open.

“Kanae-!”

Kuzuha rushed in, nostrils flaring. His pupils were dilated so wide the red of his irises were barely visible.

"Blood- You're bleeding again-"

Abruptly, Kanae realized how he probably looked, standing there in the washroom covered in blood. 

"I'm fine, I'm fine, it's just a nosebleed," Kanae laughed self-deprecatingly, wiping his fingers against the towel.

He wasn't sure if it was because the smell of blood had a greater effect on vampires, but Kuzuha's expression hadn't improved at all. Where the vampire was still gripping the doorknob, the trembling of his fingers caused his nails to rattle quietly against the cold metal.

"Look, I'll wash it off," Kanae continued soothingly, moving to turn the tap back on. Thankfully, the bleeding seemed to have stopped some time earlier.

As he carefully washed his hands and cleaned off his face, Kuzuha hovered behind him, unblinking stare fixated on the mirror. His eyes almost seemed to be looking through the glass, as if watching some unknown scene in Kanae's reflection.

After Kanae finished washing off the last of the blood from his skin, Kuzuha finally looked away, avoiding the brunet's inquiring gaze.

What’s wrong, Kanae wanted to ask.

He thought of Kuzuha’s strange tension that deepened as the weather grew colder, the darkening shadows under the vampire’s eyes, the increasingly long streaming hours. The way Kuzuha was trying so hard now to act like he hadn’t just panicked over a single nosebleed, a fragile imitation of nonchalance in his face and stance.

“Are you sure you ate breakfast earlier?” Kanae joked instead, tone light. “The smell of food really brought you over quickly, huh?” 

“Hey, it’s not like vampires live on blood anymore,” Kuzuha shot back with a forced casualness, still not meeting Kanae’s eyes. “This is modern society. You’ll get arrested if you just suddenly start drinking from people, you know.”

After a stilted pause, Kuzuha seemed to have made up his mind about something. He lifted his head to stare Kanae in the face, expression cautious. “After all, the human and supernatural war is old history, right? It’s not like we have to drink blood for the extra power these days.”

For a moment, Kanae was silent. 

Kanae was good at forgetting things - his past was a gaping black hole, stolen by his recurrent amnesia. Usually, he didn’t mind it. It was hard to miss something he didn’t remember, though it sometimes made talking to others difficult when topics like childhood came up.

Sometimes, though, there were things Kuzuha would do that made Kanae wonder. 

When Kuzuha first found out Kanae’s ears were pierced, the sense of novelty in Kuzuha’s eyes whenever he saw Kanae wearing earrings had lingered for months.

You always wanted to get them pierced, the vampire once said absentmindedly while poking at the amnesiac’s ears. Kanae had them done months before they’d ever met.

When they went to a café during their first outing together, Kanae had gone to the washroom straight away.

Kuzuha ended up having to order for the both of them. Though he’d never mentioned his usual order to the vampire before, when Kanae came back, his favourite drink was already on the table.

When they held hands for the first time, it hadn’t been a major event. While out shopping, Kuzuha grabbed him by the hand so they wouldn’t be separated on a crowded street.

Yet the warm feeling of Kuzuha’s palm against his had felt like two puzzle pieces slotting together; like seeing an old friend he hadn’t realized he’d missed.

Like coming home.

It wasn’t like Kanae had never brought up the topic before. There were a few instances where he’d attempted to casually express curiosity about their shared past in a conversation, but Kuzuha avoided it every time. After a while, Kanae stopped asking.

Now, as Kanae looked at the tense vampire in front of him, he felt like he finally understood.

— I wonder if our story was a tragedy.  
  


After a beat, Kanae opened his mouth.

"Well, the past is in the past." Kanae stared seriously into Kuzuha's eyes. Seeing the wavering expression on the vampire’s face, he paused, only to abruptly break into a guileless smile.

"Wah, I guess even vampires have to adapt to the times!"

He was sure Kuzuha knew his cluelessness was an act, but neither of them mentioned it. Gently, Kanae reached out to interlock their fingers, tugging the still slightly paralyzed Kuzuha forward.

Kuzuha didn't say anything, but Kanae could feel the vampire gripping his hand back tighter than usual.

Kanae's smile softened, gaze lingering on Kuzuha’s face. Suddenly, he leaned forward, pecking Kuzuha lightly on the cheek.

"!!!!!!!! You-!"

"Well, well, let's get back to the stream, the viewers are probably wondering what's taking us so long~" Kanae interrupted with a laugh, his ears feeling slightly hot at his own actions. He pulled a blushing and sputtering vampire along behind him.

"Kanae- You- Warn me first next time...!"

* * *

The cold light of a winter dawn slanted quietly through the tall church windows. In this pale light, the bright blood on the tiled floor seemed unnatural against the black of Kanae's vestments.

"Hey, why are you crying?"

Despite the obvious weakness in Kanae's voice, the smile on his face was as gentle as ever. Hovering over him, Kuzuha's face was still twisted in panic, fingers scrabbling uselessly against Kanae's shirt.

"Don't you like red? Vampires like blood, right?"

"Shut up!" Kuzuha's voice cut sharply through the cold air. In the chill, his short, unsteady breathing created little puffs of mist, like pale clouds of smoke. "This wasn't supposed to - Stop talking, it'll come out faster - "

As if he hadn't heard anything, Kanae lifted his hand to cup the vampire's cheek, only for his arm to slip back down almost immediately. In the corner of his eye, the rows of cold stone pews seemed to grow dark and blurred. 

Ah, his strength was running out. While he couldn't say he was expecting things to turn out like this, it wasn't a bad way to go at all.

"Hey, Kuzuha. Don't you think it's nice?" His voice was faint. "I look pretty like this, right?"

Kuzuha opened his mouth to respond, only to close it silently. For the first time, he felt like maybe being a vampire was a curse - to his enhanced hearing, the individual beats of Kanae's heart were loud and clear, like the ticking of a clock.

As the silences between beats grew longer and longer, time seemed to slow down with it.

Thump.

Thump.

…Thump.

The silence was stifling. Words were still caught in Kuzuha's throat. Pretty? He wanted to ask, but no matter how hard he tried, his lungs remained closed up. It was as if his body knew that there was no point trying anymore.

— after all, there was no one left to listen to him anyway.

Where the priest lay against the altar, red bloomed like flowers across Kanae's chest. His face was delicate and soft, as mesmerizing as he always looked when he was asleep. 

It was pretty. So why didn't it feel like it at all?

**Author's Note:**

> dusting off my extremely rusty writing skills for chronoir


End file.
